Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Bloxistential crisis

So. Not a lot of blogging of late. And I'm not really feeling exercised about that. I'm not really sure what this blog is for anymore. As you may recall, I started it as a valve for book-writing anxiety. But now my book has been burnt down and reborn and rebuilt and submitted and somewhere along that way the anxiety got jettisoned. I'm not really interested in journaling, and even if I were to treat this blog as a journal, my days are pretty much all the same, as I imagine all of our days are, and those departures from routine are probably more interesting as experiences than as reports anyway. I could blog about academia and its issues, but other bloggers do that far better and with far more thoroughness than I have interest or time to do. I could blog about teaching, but what's to say?: I love teaching, and, Grading takes time. I could easily focus on the food-porn, but again, other people already do that well and also I won't trouble myself to take pictures and besides I run out of interest and it starts to sound like I'm just congratulating myself on eating good things. (On tap for tonight: pumpkin gnocchi with a browned butter and brown sugar sauce, raisins, and crisp-fried sage leaves.) I could de-anonymize and turn this blog into some sort of PR organ to complement my real website, but I don't actually care about the Po-Biz, so I'm not sure what I'd say beyond promoting readings which my website already does.

The thing is that I have really valued the perspective of folks I've got to know through this blog, and I'd hate to lose that. But it's hard to justify the time-expenditure of blogging, and hard to commit to making a public utterance that's worth someone else's reading time.

Maybe I'll just stop feeling like this is an obligation, and post something when I feel moved to do so.

8 comments:

squadratomagico said...

I went through the same set of thoughts, and struggled for a long time to keep my blog going. Like you, at a certain point I wasn't sure anymore what purpose the blog served, but valued the bloggy community and didn't want to lose those connections. I kept it going for a while, with diminishing inspiration and interest. Eventually, I came to the conclusion that I just didn't have the Will to Blog any more: it was time to celebrate the fun I'd had with squadratomagico, but to let it die a dignified death.

Good luck deciding what to do! I'll miss you if you stop, but I understand the desire to do so.

jo(e) said...

You've got the right idea. Post whenever you feel like it. Don't let it become a chore on your to-do list.

Laura Gross Smith said...

I stumbled upon your blog some time ago, by chance. I read it for two reasons, well maybe three. You are real, honest and are following a career path that I am exploring. So no matter what you blog about, I would still be interested in reading it. Maybe the trajectory will become apparent as you write. Write first, think later.

Lexy and Jared said...

I like hearing about whatever you choose to write about—food-porn without pictures, your Things and Neruda-land, your anxiety, etc. I don't think your blog needs to be purpose-driven. I do hope you continue because I would miss your voice. I love you, I love your writing, but I also love your sanity. So, don't allow the blog to be an obligation. A very clever teacher once told me that when one writes, one should scratch the most interesting itch. (You said it much better than that, and I think there was some sort of dog metaphor involved.) Scratch on, my friend. Scratch on.

Lisa B. said...

ditto what everyone else is saying--blog when you want to--I like reading what you say when you do. You're fun to read.

Library Diva said...

I can relate to this a lot. I used to blog quite a bit. Then I got a job writing. I was spending 40 hours a week working for a local newspaper and had thousands of people reading what I wrote. It seemed to make blogging a lot less urgent. I only got back into it when a friend of mine wanted a NaBloPoMo buddy. I just did it to support her, and I've been surprised to find out how much I've come to enjoy it again.

I've been working at getting more readers, which is how I found your blog. I try to "next blog" my way to a few things every evening and leave comments at the ones that look sympatico. In my short trip through the blogosphere, I can say that blogsestential crises are not unusual at all. I've come across so many that have been abandoned and infrequently used. I'd encourage you to keep at it as much as you want. You do have something worthwhile to say!

Jill said...

Screw these guys. I want daily posts, by noon, on topics I assign. Dance, monkey, dance!

I forgot you have a website. I think I looked at it in January and thought "That looks great! I know I should have a website; I should make a website like that one!"

Anapessimistic said...

Funny you should write this. I plan to shut down my blog after my year away is up. I started my own blog with a sense of a project, as it sounds like you started your blog with your own. Once the project is over, what a blog is becomes a very interesting, very weird, very meta- question. I can understand wanting to stop, or even shut down. Or just post if you need it. It's a strange genre of writing.